It's challenging in a loving way.

What is it like being an autism mom? The ups, the downs, and the emotional struggle.

The ups are every new milestone. Even though they achieved it later in life you learn to embrace the joy and the small things. When he actually speaks a sentence for the first time when I didn't think he had it in him. The first time he told me "I love you momma". The downs are the struggle I see my son go through. The meltdowns can be exhausting. When I don't exactly understand what he is going through in those moments. I want to help and protect him from what is bothering him but he can't tell me. It gets frustrating. The way everyday stimuli and things can actually hurt that we don't bat an eye at. The emotional struggle is finally realizing that your child has autism. It was a hard pill for me to swallow. I was in denial for a long time. As a parent you don't want to think or realize that there is something different about your child.

What fears do you face as you raise your child?

That someday he might not be able to live on his own. The bullying of other children that won't understand him. I see people in public that stare at him for his quirks. He doesn't notice it but when that day comes how will he react? He has no friends because he struggles relating to other people. What if he is a loner? What happens when Me and my husband are no longer here? Will he be taken care of? Will he need it? A lot of questions.

What do you wish other moms knew about what you go through?

It's very taxing. Every part of my day is taking my child to therapies that just help him thrive. How to get dressed, brush his teeth, drink from a normal cup, how to simply ask for things etc... There are days that he melts down for hours. Even though he does have the language he still can't tell us whats bothering him. When I post a small status on FB about the stress of it I'm just letting it out. He is a good kid though and I wouldn't want him any other way. I don't want to put too much negativity on it because our children also deserve to be celebrated. Being a mom isn't easy but it's even harder raising one with a disability. My child is just like anyone else's though. He loves unconditionally. Autism is just his diagnosis. As a parent with autism we just want understanding and acceptance. Take time to educate your children on this.

Do you have other autism mommies who have inspired you?

Yes I have a small circle of mom friends that have autistic children. One in particular gives me hope that my son will be like hers someday. She worked so hard to get her child in a regular classroom with no extra help. That's a goal I hope for my child someday. Her son is more independent and I want that for my child. Seeing older children at his autism center also inspires me. It gives me more hope for his future.